Marriage of figure and ground

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for you, you for

whom I like misplaced

I’m utilizing towards the ocean. An angular silhouette rises up out of my lane: a square, skeletal portion of equipment is on the dual carriageway.

For the interval of the wreckage crouches a girl. She faces oncoming web page traffic in the posture of a sniper. I swerve.

under me the

dual carriageway moves we are

remaindered bands

of gentle

The air in California is porous, diffuse. You would also’t rely on the bodily atmosphere to essentially feel your edges.

It be important to make your edges alongside with your mind.


In dance circles in the meanwhile, there’s reasonably various discuss about decolonizing the physique.

“He owns produce,” “doesn’t he?” “The tyrant” “owns produce.” (Alice Notley)

Other of us’s gestures are imprinted deep in my fascia. Here is a dancer thing. It’s also a particular person thing.

archive of flesh

unseen trash fireplace

a tissued nest

wintry gyre

What roughly dance create you deem can like to you specialise in shifting free from the worth of thoroughly different bodies?

Accumulate you deem a dance without produce, without edges?

An elusive quest. How create you perceive what’s non-produce without radiant produce? Here is the holy grail of improvisation: to lose your self in nameless, burgeoning potentiality. For expert improvisers, the atmosphere isn’t very any longer a static plinth, nonetheless an extension of the physique itself.

Eadweard Muybridge equipped motion as a chain of static forms, thereby proposing that every part, no topic how liquid, how kinetic, would possibly possibly also be grasped. Within the explain of a Muybridge discontinuance-motion series, scuttle is broken down to its constituent parts, coaxing the mind to bear the connective tissue.

“It is the threshold preserving aside my tongue from the taste for which it longs that teaches me what an edge is.” (Anne Carson)

It’s very unlikely to rid the physique of the worth of thoroughly different bodies. We’re born already encoded by our mother’s encoded physique.

However I can have faith setting the phrases of transmission. I can have faith a room wherein we provide every thoroughly different moves. No person’s staring at. Every of us chooses whether or no longer or no longer to soak up the selections.

That moment of apparent resolution. Enmanuel Ghent writes about the incompatibility between give up and submission. You would also resolve to submit to somebody. However you would no longer alter the phrases of give up. I deem my physique is conscious of the incompatibility, nonetheless I am no longer obvious. I like submitted to the bodies of thoroughly different of us as a technique of forthcoming give up, taking into consideration: here’s as close as I can rating.

to let somebody

dwell in you to

be written on



We had been without the proscenium for more than a twelve months.

Proscenium (n.) c. 1600, “stage of an frail theater,” from Latin proscaenium, from Greek proskēnion “the placement in front of the scenery,” also “entrance of a tent,” from expert “in front, sooner than” + skēnē “stage, tent, sales whisper.” Trendy sense of “situation between the curtain and the orchestra” (normally including the curtain and its framework). Hence, figuratively, “foreground, front.”

The gentle stage foregrounds the figure. The dance is nicely lit. The motion is known.

Experimental performance, in incompatibility, normally dangers “unrecognizability as a subject.” (Judith Butler) Performers imprecise their bodies, ask audiences to be joyful by glimmers of motion in advance darkness. This roughly dance says: to admire me is to let me discontinuance unknown.

Present e mail subject line from Lincoln Heart: “When will you in actuality feel comfortable returning to Lincoln Heart for the Performing Arts?”

The proscenium has closed for enterprise. Now not all of us can give you the money for to sit down down spherical and wait for the machine of production to crank up again. Some of us are drained of navigating a subject that devalues us. Some of us are factual drained. I do know dozens of expert dancers who this twelve months made up our minds to rupture their careers to enter social work or ASL or performance studies or law or scuttle therapy or studio art. I must undergo behold to this cultural migration.

Finally, dance will proceed. The rich will peaceful must expend children to The Nutcracker.

My buddy Parker says, “I hope that the dancers who advance help be taught to ask for more.”

Now and again you to resolve to discontinuance dancing. Now and again the resolution is made for you. In overall it’s a aggregate, which feels advanced. Did you secretly must rating injured? Or rating fired? Here is absurd; no one desires to rating injured or fired. However here’s how about a of us deem.


What happens within a dancer after they walk away the proscenium on the help of?

Virginia Woolf, in her pleased conclusion to The Waves, a fresh preoccupied with seeing and being seen, writes: “The face taking a deem at me has gone. The stress is eradicated.” In solitude, she finds that: “From me had dropped the extinct cloak, the extinct response; the hollowed hand that beats help sounds.”

My physique, as soon as relentlessly in the foreground, softens into my lifestyles. Original parts of myself emerge, as if discovering a contemporary lover. Under the pores and skin, currents shift. Circuits re-wire.

Desire changes produce as prerequisites dictate.


As I dance less, I write more. To paraphrase Renee Gladman, who writes of the symbiosis between writing and drawing: I dance myself out of dancing by dancing no longer because my taste for it has diminished nor because I like misplaced mutter, nonetheless because I like begun to negate what I must claim in thoroughly different areas.

My physique moves all around the salvage page.

In language, I can like to be braver than I had been as a dancer. Braver than I am as a particular person. Much less hidden.

In writing, I attain for the same thing that drew me to dancing: give up. I must persist with desire till it rips into illogical conclusions. I must write in “a language lined with flesh,” to summon “an entire carnal stereophony.” (Roland Barthes) I must use language to destabilize itself, to pressure a stuttering of produce “as even though possessed with the pressure of thoroughly different issues.” (John Rajchman on Deleuze) To send words careening into every thoroughly different. To write down myself into abstraction. To have faith abstraction as a liberatory tool.

flouresce organ

tampdown denrage

bisect bloodtight

searstare ashword

But habits persist. Accumulate you deem the swerve a ways from your line of peep? The the same dilemmas walk with the circulate — the scrape of give up, the scrape of being seen — on the salvage page as when I danced on stage and also you sat in darkness.

“As quickly as I desire I am asking to be thought to be.” (Frantz Fanon)

produce is a fence

with 5 fingers



I am lying on my dazzling facet on the Broad Dual carriageway, which is now closed to vehicles. The earth presses into my outer arm and leg admire a ethical bruise. My weight pours sideways by my chest. To begin to roll backward, I lever into the ground with the open air of my dazzling thigh as my left hip pulls help. My knees separate. I roll all around the help of my ribs, over the knuckled ridge of my backbone, onto my thoroughly different facet.

Over the dune to my left, surfers scoot in the water. I can’t deem them, nonetheless I have faith them.

Of us walk admire neon tracers, admire sonic waves. I am fragment of a motley procession in retrograde. A dogs rolls by on a skateboard. The dogs is pushing the skateboard with its help left leg.

This didn’t occur. Neatly, there used to be a dogs on a skateboard. However I didn’t lie down in the dual carriageway. I have faith it. I have faith it so laborious I essentially feel it. I have faith you so laborious I essentially feel you.

I have faith working towards you as I strive to rating a continual sound. I have faith raising my palms to signal you from a pleasurable distance. I have faith you half-closing your eyes with pleasure, opening your mouth in an O and holding it there. I have faith holding your saltiness close and whispering:

Let’s be indecent. Let’s pump our legs. Let’s crest the hill towards the ocean. Let’s velocity. Let’s open a yowl into the evening. Let’s rub in opposition to our bicycle seats. Let’s sweat under our dresses. Let’s spit out the misplaced objects we’ve absorbed. Let’s howl in the dunes in the tangerine gentle with the shit and the plastic trash and the dull birds.

an offshore signal

ripple underground

intermittent moan


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